Gifted Girls in Brazil — Intense, Insightful, Introspective, Inquisitive

“I always wondered too much, thought too much, felt too much, craved too much. And I always kept it all to myself. I was disconnected from my peers. Things hurt more, mattered more…I take every single person seriously and I do all I can to never hurt them. Friends found me either silly or too serious or annoying…”

Carolina, 21, and Camila, 18, are Brazilians. They have rainforest minds. They are extremely sensitive, intuitive, socially responsible, perfectionistic, emotional, passionate learners, and highly intelligent.

“I used to freak out every now and then because I just thought I was not normal but I also didn’t want to be like other people. It was so frustrating and it used to drive me crazy, I always thought ‘what am I doing here if there’s no one like me? when am I actually going to say what I think? when will I find somebody like me, to understand me?’…”

“l’ve always complained too much about the clothes I wear, I don’t like labels, embroidery, or any shirt not made of cotton. I’ve always hated loud sounds and sneeze when perfume is strong. Screaming, fighting, someone crying, and criticism: I am very reactive to all of this… I trust my intuition a lot. I feel like I can read people, what they are feeling or needing, or what the chances are of something going wrong with my decision… I am always reading. I learn fast. People like to ask me for help…When I don’t understand something new or when something is difficult to do, I usually get paralyzed…I’m afraid I won’t succeed, and if I’m not the best, I’m not smart…”

Barbara Kerr has studied gifted girls for over forty years. At the end of her most recent book, she includes suggestions for parents, educators, and for the gifted girls and women themselves. She writes:

“…Once or twice in a lifetime, you will meet that smart little girl who seems wise beyond her years, who ponders the great philosophical questions, and who seeks knowledge not only in books but through her dreams and visions. She is the spiritually intelligent smart girl, who may transform our society with her transcendent vision. Find all those girls and then nurture them…”

We found two in Brazil.

_________________________________________

To my bloggEEs: Do you relate to what Carolina and Camila are saying? What is it like where you live? If you want to know more specifically about gifted girls, Barbara Kerr’s research is a wonderful resource. And fellas, I haven’t forgotten about you! Remember this post? Thank you all for being here. Much love to you. (And thank you so much to Carolina and Camila for sharing your stories with us.)


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Author: Paula Prober

I’m a psychotherapist and consultant in private practice based in Eugene, Oregon. I specialize in international consulting with gifted adults and parents of gifted children. I’ve been a teacher and an adjunct instructor at the University of Oregon and a frequent guest presenter at Oregon State University and Pacific University. I’ve written articles on giftedness for the Eugene Register-Guard, the Psychotherapy Networker, Advanced Development Journal and online for psychotherapy dot net, Rebelle Society, Thrive, Introvert Dear, and Highly Sensitive Refuge. My first book, Your Rainforest Mind: A Guide to the Well-Being of Gifted Adults and Youth, is a collection of case studies of gifted clients along with many strategies and resources for gifted adults and teens. My second book, Journey Into Your Rainforest Mind: A Field Guide for Gifted Adults and Teens, Book Lovers, Overthinkers, Geeks, Sensitives, Brainiacs, Intuitives, Procrastinators, and Perfectionists is a collection of my most popular blog posts along with writing exercises for self-exploration and insight.

48 responses to “Gifted Girls in Brazil — Intense, Insightful, Introspective, Inquisitive”

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  1. Gifted Adults Around The World — What Do They Have In Common? Meet Alice In Brazil | Your Rainforest Mind

    […] Brazil, Finland, Netherlands, Portugal, Spain, Malaysia, India, Chile, Canada (via Cameroon) (If you are from a country not yet represented and would like to be profiled, email me!) Of course, most of my experiences are with N. Americans. I feel so grateful to be able to learn and share this expanded view. […]


  2. Alice Coursier Avatar
    Alice Coursier

    I relate to what they say! Sometimes I wonder if I trust my intuition enough. Working on it, though. Thank you!


    1. Paula Prober Avatar
      Paula Prober

      It’s worth working on, Alice, for sure.


    2. Carolina Gomes Avatar
      Carolina Gomes

      Happy to hear that! And yes, trust your intuition, it’s the best way really 🌟


  3. Joyce Baker Avatar
    Joyce Baker

    Hi Paula, I enjoyed the young girls presentation. Good job on your part to create this approachable way to spread the message. 😊

    Sent from my iPhone

    >


    1. Paula Prober Avatar
      Paula Prober

      Thank you, Joyce. Nice to see you here.


    2. Carolina Gomes Avatar
      Carolina Gomes

      I’m happy that you liked, and Paula writes so well right? The post came out beautifully 💙


      1. Paula Prober Avatar
        Paula Prober

        I’m glad you liked it, Carolina. Thanks for all of your thoughtful comments!


        1. Carolina Gomes Avatar
          Carolina Gomes

          love it here 💙


  4. veroniqz Avatar
    veroniqz

    I had never seen this video by Joelle… and had never heard of this gender development thing. Never thought of any connection with giftedness, thinking about my weird boyish playing habits – either climbing in trees, running around like cowboys-and-indians (always being the indian of course), or racing with toy cars – or, my lack of urge to ever dress up like a girl. No skirts or dresses for me, just a whole in the knee instead. Interesting… 🤔


    1. veroniqz Avatar
      veroniqz

      A *hole* that is, obviously… 😁


      1. Paula Prober Avatar
        Paula Prober

        Hm…I don’t remember that part in the video, veroniqz. Will have to watch it again. Thanks for sharing.


    2. Carolina Gomes Avatar
      Carolina Gomes

      This part from the video got me so indentified, same here. I only like comfy clothes, I don’t care about what is seen as “feminine” or “masculine” according to society, so any cloths that I like and feel good using I use, it’s funny sometimes cause some people come to me and say “oh this is so in fashion right now” and I’m like “really?” I never know and never care too. It’s good to find more people to identify with. Are you brazilian too?
      Sending good energy!


      1. veroniqz Avatar
        veroniqz

        No, I’m Dutch… Especially when it comes to toys, I don’t think I ever owned a doll, just animals and cars and building blocks and stuff. And like you, I looove unfeminine comfy clothes…
        Good vibes back!


        1. Carolina Gomes Avatar
          Carolina Gomes

          I’ve had dolls, but the ones that I keep till these days are my stuffed animals, cards, building blocks too and games and stuff like that. And yeah welcome to the comfy clothes club! And hey, I think you’ll like even more Joelle’s channel, she’s dutch too and her videos are great ^^


  5. Elaine Barretto Avatar
    Elaine Barretto

    Another Brazilian gifted lady here! Happy for you Carolina and Camila, that found out so early, that will definitely help going forward! I only identified as one when I turned 40, so now that I finished reading all the books that I could grab on the topic I am slowly trying to heal my wounds and figuring out how to go from here! Much love to you.


    1. Paula Prober Avatar
      Paula Prober

      It seems that after Covid you Brazilians ought to have a RFM party! Thank you, Elaine. <3


    2. Camila Avatar
      Camila

      Hi, Elaine
      Thank you <3
      I imagine the difficulties you suffered from spending years with unanswered questions. I am lucky to know what I am and how I am so soon, but we are gifted and, even though it is complicated, it is a privilege to have such abilities. I hope that now you can heal your wounds, and that we know how to enjoy our gifts.


    3. Carolina Gomes Avatar
      Carolina Gomes

      Yay! Sorry for answering this late, I am having difficulty managing time while doing my final paper to university, it’s been crazy!
      Thank you! Omg yeah, that helps so so much, it’s everything!! You must have suffered so much more with the wonderings and thoughts all this time, I can imagine just how much, but I am so happy that you figured it out, really really happy for you! Sending a hug, wish you all the happiness and light in life 💙 and ow thanks, sending love too!!


  6. Ana Júlia Avatar
    Ana Júlia

    Hi, Paula! This post really resonates with me. I have similar struggles with clothing tags, strong scents (especially the “masculine” ones), and texture of things like food or fabrics. I’ve always been seen as the wise, “adult-like” kid who spends hours in the library. Friends and teachers usually trust me with unusual things like keeping a secret, giving advice on a serious matter or representing the class. Perfectionism, fear of failure (to the point that I can’t start anything new) and procrastination are a problem too. Sometimes it can be definitly overwhelming, but I’m learning to breath slowly and take my time doing things. The quote from Kerr is such a heartwarming one!
    Much love from Brazil <3


    1. Paula Prober Avatar
      Paula Prober

      Looks like we have a lovely Brazilian contingent! Thanks Ana Julia. Good to hear from you.


    2. Carolina Gomes Avatar
      Carolina Gomes

      I am happy with your comment, Ana Júlia. I’m happy it was a way of identification. I identify with all you said, absolutely all of it! It’s incredible. And yeah, I tend to think that we are always drifting between extremes, trying to find balance, so yeah, sometimes it’s all procrastination and then other times it’s all about being on crazy productiveness. It’s a thing that I learned to get better with time, because before I couldn’t find a way to have a more healthy routine since I was drived from my mind to the most difficult and existencial questions through the night, and it includes the question “why I am and feel so different from everyone?”. So I’m happy that u are learning to manage it, I think that Kerr’s quote is truly inpiring to that. We all will find our way! Sending good energy from Brasil too ☽


      1. Ana Júlia Avatar
        Ana Júlia

        Hi! I’m glad that I am not alone in all of this. Finding balance is hard, but recognizing that what I was doing was not healthy already helped me to manage things a little bit better. And I definitly remember asking myself endlessly why I could never feel welcomed by my schoolmates and what made me so different from them. I am happy for you, too! We will be just fine.


        1. Carolina Gomes Avatar
          Carolina Gomes

          You’re surely not alone, Ana Júlia! I used to think that too, mainly when I didn’t know about giftedness, but yeah, we are not alone, and that’s really really comforting. Well, I think I know exactly what you talking about, I used to sleep so late, couldn’t do it early because my mind was always full with questions and worryings or I had so many feelings then I used to escape focusing on things that I like, as watching films and series and reading books until I could go to sleep. About the schoolmates, same here! I was and am still, so different from them. (I do university, by the way that’s the reason I took these days to respond you, I really wanted to do it sooner but I couldn’t, everytime that I came here and started writing an reply my time ended, because I had such a demand this week, really, so many things that I only stopped to eat and sleep, and I wanted to take a time to respond you well). And thank you so much, yeah we’ll be just fine!!
          Hope you are well, sending good vibes!


          1. Ana Júlia Avatar
            Ana Júlia

            It’s ok! High school is also demanding a lot now, don’t worry about replying fast. I’ve always been an early sleeper, so taking my time to relax and understand everything that had happend on the day was not that bad. I hope that you’re doing better now! Sending you good vibes too. Good luck with uni! <3


            1. Carolina Gomes Avatar
              Carolina Gomes

              Thanks! Oh that’s good, now I see just how much, i’m definetely doing better now, having a routine with the right hours to do things is the best thing we can do to both our bodies and overworking minds! Thanks, it’s the final journey now to graduation and is working out! 💙


            2. Carolina Gomes Avatar
              Carolina Gomes

              Hey Ana Júlia! Listen, I finally made my blog. I found it to be a place where I can share my expression through photo and texts, wich I never really could do on social media since the stuff I wanna put out in the world are really important and meaningful to me, and now in the highly gifted community I feel that I can. I made the first post today, and will keep working on the site soon, so if you want to get to know it, it would be interesting to have rfm friends from Brazil there. Hope you are well 🌟


              1. Paula Prober Avatar
                Paula Prober

                Hi Carolina. Do you want to put the link to your blog here?


                1. Carolina Gomes Avatar
                  Carolina Gomes

                  I was going to write to you right now haha, as always I forget to say something in the comment, it’s the enthusiasm omg
                  I sent a new comment with the link now, if that’s okay to you, I would really love to post it in the comment yes ^^ and thanks for the help you gave me with finding this new world of giftedness.
                  This blog that I made is an initiative of finding a space of expression and connection with rfm / hg friends out there 🌟


              2. Carolina Gomes Avatar
                Carolina Gomes

                Oh sorry I didn’t gave the instructions. By clicking on my name here on the comment you’ll be redirected to the blog, and my post is in “wonders”, or just click in this link https://avalonswonderland.wordpress.com


                1. Carolina Pery Avatar
                  Carolina Pery

                  Hey Carolina! Really loved your post. I’ve been struggling with the fact that I have a RFM, and wondering what is my place in the world. Will I ever fit? Willl I ever feel good anywhere? The worst part is my perfectionism, I get stuck when starting things. I’ve always liked to study and learn things that interest me, too.
                  I can really connect to having a hard time expressing your thoughts and feelings, they’re usually so intense that takes me a while to process them before I can express them.
                  It would be great to get in contact with you! Here’s my instagram account 🙂
                  https://www.instagram.com/carol_pery/


                  1. Paula Prober Avatar
                    Paula Prober

                    I hope you Brazilian women can connect with each other. You can form your own Brazilian RFM clan! Carolina Pery, it looks like you can click on Carolina Gomes’ link above as a way to find her. I have heard from other Brazilians as well. So there are clearly RFMs in your country! <3


                    1. Carolina Gomes Avatar
                      Carolina Gomes

                      Thanks Paula. It’s comforting to know that there are other people like us out there, since it is a thing that I had only got to imagine before and still do. It would be great!! 💫


                  2. Carolina Gomes Avatar
                    Carolina Gomes

                    Hey Carolina! Sorry for taking so long, I haven’t been seeing my email lately.
                    What a joy to hear from you! It’s always very surprising to me when I find some brazilian RFM friend. I am going through these things too, and i am happy to know that you are out there trying too. We are all going to find our places in the world, may the universe helps us! 💫
                    And thanks, me too, i will talk to you there ✨


    3. Camila Avatar
      Camila

      Hey, Ana
      It’s good to know that there are more people who share your unusual sensitivity, and also about perfectionism, fears …
      But as you said, it is for our time that we learn how to deal with our particularities.


      1. Ana Júlia Avatar
        Ana Júlia

        You’re right! It is always good to know that people who are just like us exist somewhere! Sending much love to all of us.


  7. Adriana Vazzoler-Mendonca Avatar
    Adriana Vazzoler-Mendonca

    Hi Paula, I am a Brazilian rain-forest-minded adult. I have been identified so at the age of 48, I graduated in Psychology and now I dedicate my career to mentoring and coaching others like us (young adults, adults and seniors). I also help families, teachers, lawyers, any kind of professional who deals with giftedness issues. I would love to belong to your network to join forces. I am looking for an online master’s programme to expand scientific production about adults and elders. adriana.italia@gmail.com my whatsapp is +55 19 99175-9893


    1. Paula Prober Avatar
      Paula Prober

      It sounds like you are a great resource for gifted Brazilians and others, Adriana! Thank you for sharing your contact information.


    2. Carolina Gomes Avatar
      Carolina Gomes

      Hey Adriana, I just want to say congrats, it’s a really good thing when we figure out who and what we are. I may say that I think it needed a lot of strenght to keep going with all the things that our incredible fast and nonstoping minds use to put us through since you only identified as RM at 48yrs old. I admire your courage and determination to raise awareness about it to help others. I guess we can all make little changes to help other people like us. I wish u all the best in life and in your great professional carreer! Sending love from Brazil too 💙


  8. Paula Prober Avatar
    Paula Prober

    Hi Carolina. I may have deleted another comment of yours by mistake. If I did, please send again! 🙂


    1. Carolina Gomes Avatar
      Carolina Gomes

      Okay, I think it’s the one that I answered hearting u back hehe ><


  9. River Aaland Avatar
    River Aaland

    Gifted girls change the world. ❤️


    1. Paula Prober Avatar
      Paula Prober

      Indeed.


    2. Carolina Gomes Avatar
      Carolina Gomes

      Oh thank you! 💙


  10. Carolina Gomes Avatar
    Carolina Gomes

    Paula, thank you so much for this! I feel good knowing that telling my story I can help others hg/RM to find peace with themselves. It is not easy to be like this, at least for me, like I said, it used to drive me crazy sometimes. Being different does that, but you know what it also does? Wonderful things. So many of them, and things that only a few people will experience in life. True connection. Pure intentions. Pure love, and a deep one, and in every little thing that we aprecciate. And the video from Joelle’s, it’s a great connection too, I’m sure this post is very important indeed. The work from Barbara Kerr… wow. This quote is marvelous, I’ll search for her books definetely! Thank you again, sending love


    1. Paula Prober Avatar
      Paula Prober

      Thank YOU so much, Carolina! Sending love back to you. <3


      1. Carolina Gomes Avatar
        Carolina Gomes

        💙


    2. Alice Avatar
      Alice

      Hi Carol! Hi Camila! I’m Brazilian and gifted too, and I had a wonderful opportunity talking to Paula these days – you, your blog and your book have changed my life, Paula, and I’m forever grateful! First, I love this post! It’s been such a lonely path for me my whole life, because I’ve always felt no one could understand me – and now I know that it has to do with my gifted traits. So, here I am if you need a new – and of course intense – gifted friend from Brazil!

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