Just because you can do the task faster, better, and more completely, does not mean you have to agree to do that task.
Just because you were told you must live up to your great potential, does not mean you have to be the best whatever who ever lived, win all the awards before you are 30, and never ever let all of those well-meaning but misguided, unimaginative people be disappointed that you chose yourself over your potential.
Just because all of your relatives and friends have chosen one long career path, does not mean you cannot change jobs, career paths, hobbies, and maybe even relationships over your richly varied lifetime.
Just because your parents want you to join the family business and continue their legacy of alcoholism and denial because, they say, you owe it to them, does not mean you have to follow in their footsteps. What they do not know is that your choice to step out of alcoholism and denial will change the trajectory of their lives even though they may never actually know it, feel it, or acknowledge it. And it will surely change yours. For the better.
Just because you are the best acupuncturist in town and sick people are clamoring for your attention, does not mean you have to exhaust yourself to accommodate them.
Just because you are great with children, does not mean you have to create any of your own.
Just because you are highly sensitive to visual stimuli, sounds, tastes, textures, emotions, smells, chemicals, and obnoxious neighbors, does not mean you have a diagnosis or a disability. And it does not mean you have to let yourself be bombarded by said sensitivities when there are ways to avoid, reduce, and manage them even if other humans will judge you and say how diva-like you are.
Just because you can always make your projects better, does not mean you have to raise the bar after you finish said projects so that you never really celebrate the finishing.
Just because you can intuit what people, animals, and plants are thinking and feeling and sense when they are unhappy even when they say they are happy, does not mean you are delusional or psychotic or a witch. (Although you may be a witch, and that would be a good thing, we need more witches.)
Just because you have 13 thrilling unread books by your bed, 8 podcasts you long to download, 4 new apps you want to design, plus numerous poems to write, songs to compose, and trees to plant, does not mean you are having an unusually difficult day. In fact, the difficult days are when you do not have ten items on your plate while juggling six more and looking forward to the items on those other plates you have yet to meet.
Just because you color code your sweaters, organize your books by author, and are repainting your bedroom for the fourteenth time, does not mean you are obsessive compulsive.
Just because you are extremely articulate and can describe your deep existential depression and anxiety in great detail to your therapist while being successful at your job, does not mean you must be fine and not actually need therapy.
Just because you think about the climate crisis, racism, and poverty most every day does not mean you can not also find joy when you are hiking the trail on a sunny afternoon.
Just because you think deeply and often about the meaning, purpose, and quality of life on earth does not mean you are a neurotic, self-absorbed, overthinking mess. And, even if you are, on occasion, a neurotic, self-absorbed, overthinking mess, it is much better than being a neurotic, self-absorbed, underthinking mess.
Just because even simple decisions are almost impossible because you wonder about the implications, the variables, and the impact of said decisions, and you put pressure on yourself to always be right, does not mean you are not as smart as everyone says you are. In fact, you may not score well on multiple choice tests because you see all of the reasons each answer might be correct, as only a smart person can.
Just because you have been single most of your adult life, does not mean you have missed the Love Boat and will be bereft and alone forever and ever. In fact, it may mean you have been on the Love Boat all along, it just doesn’t look like two and half kids, a partner, and a picket fence.
To my bloggEEs: Can you add a “just because” to this list? Which ones fit for you? Tell us why. And much love and gratitude to you all, as always.
Speaking of your gifted soul, if you have not yet heard about The G Word Film, check it out. It is in post-production and needs funding to get to completion. If you want to donate any amount, the film makers would greatly appreciate it. This full length feature film will be a game changer.
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